SEEKING
Band to Join, Trumpet, Background Singer, Other, Banjo, Fiddle, Accordion.ABOUT
I have an ego the size of Uranus...or mine. Have a bit of an image problem... some people say I'm a freak (not Rick James kind of freak either), and I'll admit I can scare the sheet metal off the side of a steel barn. Some people call me crazy, but at least they call me (Carly Rae Jepson has nothing on me!!!!). I can't say I'm the greatest singer since Paris Hilton... here's what my fan says about me:
"Referring to Biatchy as a Musical Artist is like a reference to a cement mixer as a musical instrument."
"Ewwww... I just threw up in my mouth"
"yea, she is 'pretty dumb'... and about the sing thing please... she should just forget it and stick to hairstyling"
"I find her voice REALLY annoying. Sort of monotone man-chanting and whiny as a little kid in the supermarket produce section. I am completely mystified as to why people like her."
"She SINGS? BTW, I've always thought she looked like a man. Have you seen her man-sized hands??? "
"There’s as much chance of Biatchy being a pop star or a rock star as me flying to the moon tomorrow for breakfast."
"You have the personality of a doorknob."
"You sounded like you were being strangled."
"You came in, you called yourself champagne and you sounded like vinnegar."
"You doing that ballad is rather like casting Pee Wee Herman as Rambo."
"You have just invented a new form of torture."
"Let me throw a mathematical dilemma at you – there's 500 left, well how come the odds of you winning are a million to one?"
"Shave off your beard and wear a dress. I think you’d be a great female impersonator."
"What was that song? Darling, it's not just that you have a bad voice... you were singing notes that have never been invented."
"Your mouth is far too big when you sing. It's like looking in to a cave... I've never seen anything so huge in my life. Absolutely terrible."
"If you sung like this 2,000 years ago, people would've stoned you."
"I could sell you as a sleeping aid. I've never heard anything more boring in my life."
"Have you ever considered becoming a mime?"
"You have a good voice for instrumental music."
"You should try singing in a vacuum."
"You sound like a Jackson Pollack painting."
"My dog didn't howl that badly when we had him neutered."
"You are sing-tarded."
- Screen name:
- biatchy37246
- Member since:
- Aug 21 2012
- Active over 1 month ago
- Level of commitment:
- Just for Fun
- Years playing music:
- 1
Influences
Paris Hilton, finger nails on a chalkboard, ammonia, hairspray, listerene, miss piggy, cruella deville, little orphan annie, trolls, Martha Stuart, Lucretia Borgia, Elizabeth Bathory, Natalie from the Facts of Life, Lorena Bobbit, Wacko Jacko, Jehovah.
EQUIPMENT
hairspray, emasculation tools, oversized fake glasses, 100 year supply of heavy makeup, 20 pairs of spanx.
